~*EDIT WEDNESDAY MARCH 22*~

good thing +: he call me!! yay!! hehe!!! he called me yesterday at 11:30 pm, then at 12:30 am (today) and then at 1 am.

bad thing - : we got into a fight....again...ugh....

Hey waz up gurlies!!!! (and guys…whatever…hehe!!)

Nways, im sorry I haven’t updated as much as I should, I’ve been kinda busy, and with a
 lot of problems…

oh and guess what??!!!! im not pregnant!!! yay!!!! hahaaha!!! ....

Nways, u know how I was in this car accident with my bfriend (or ex, I don’t know waz
up)? Well, the thing is that my car was like a total lost, and I’ve been without a car since,
but I got a new car now!! Yay for me!!! Hehe!! So that’s like totally cool, cuz I fucking
hate taking the bus or asking for a fucking ride, so yeah…that’s a good thing between all
the fucking problems…

Nways, so u know how I was asking u guys for tips on what to do for my bfriend’s
birthday? Well, I made him this cute little dinner, with candles and stuff, hehe! It was
wonderful, and I got him this cool jacket that he wanted a long time ago, and a pic of me
and him together, and stuff, hehe! So yeah, he loved them, so thanks u guys for the tips!!!

But he got kinda mad that day, cuz I didn’t eat anything at dinner, I was just moving my
food around and stuff, hahaha, and he noticed and got all mad and started telling me to
stop playing with my food, and I was like “im not playing with my food, im  poking it,
which is a lot dif!!!” hahaaha, that was bad, I know, but I didn’t knew what to say…

Nways, I don’t think we’re going out anymore, cuz like I mean, we’re like always having
fight and stuff, I mean, I know every couple have their own fights every now and then,
but what we have u guys, are not just “little fights”, what my bf and I have are fucking
big-ass fights dude, EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY, what the hell, every ten fucking
 minutes I guess…and the worst part is the we fight for stupid things, u know? Like
stupid little shit, but um…there’s something I haven’t tell u guys, he is bipolar, like I
mean, he can probably be happy one minute, and then the next be all fucking angry and
the next he can be all sad and stuff, WITHOUT A REASON! That’s just the way he is!!!
And I try to understand him, and to not freacked out about it, but like there’s a limit u
know? And im a very patient person, I swear I am, but he just crushed the line too many
 times!!! So we’re like always fighting u know, like yelling at each other, calling each
other names, me hitting him and he hitting himself, and saying how much we hate each
other, and we would like break up, and u know, like stuff like that, …but after every
fight, he would call me, or come over to my house and everything would be back to
normal u know? But this last fight wasn’t like this, this time we fought on the 19^th , which
is “our special day” and we fought because he said he wanted to do something, like go
out to dinner or to the movies and stuff like that to celebrate, so he was supposed to come
over to my house and pick me up after when he got off work, but he didn’t, and then he
call me an hour later saying that he wasn’t gonna make it and blab la bla ….so I got
pissed, and we started arguing again and bla blabla…and he said something about how
tired he was of me playing games with him or something like that, so I broke up with him
and told him not to call me anymore and whatnot, and I hung up on him. But like I said,
that’s just normal stuff, and what he was supposed to do was call me back later on, and
everything good. But he didn’t…and he hasn’t call me still…so I don’t know…it’s just
like weird, u know? And I mean, I don’t care if we get back or not, but I just really wanna
know if he’s ok or something, plus, like I mean, I really miss talking to him on the phone.
He would call like every 15 minutes u know? He would call me like from work, from his
uncle’s house, from his friend’s house and stuff, just to say hi, and to see if I was ok and
stuff like that…but I don’t know, I don’t know what to thing, I don’t know if this time is
for reals, or if he’s just taking his time, or something, I don’t know!!! And like I wanna
call him so bad, but my friends told me not to, so I haven’t…but I don’t know what to do,
im just so fucking confused…but yeah…nways…

Im sorry im talking a lot about my shit and stuff, it’s just that I needed to talk to someone
and take this shit out. Cuz it’s not just this that’s bothering me, it’s also my school, my
family, and ugh!! Just like everything, u know?
 Right here is the only place where I feel safe.

 Ugh….i don’t know u guys…but whatever…hehe!!!

Nways, some tips!!! Hahahaa! (after all my drama…)

1. Eat as slowly as you can.  It takes your body around 30 minutes to realise it's food.  Chew it until it disolves in your mouth.
2. Become a vegan or vegitarian.
3. Eat in front of a mirror naked.
4. Count to 100 if you're having a craving.  Hopefully it will go away.
5. Put your fork down between every bite
6. Dont eat past 7pm.
7. Hit your stomach if it's growling too loudly.
8. Wear nail polish to hide the discolouring in your nails from lack of nutrients.
9. Take anti heartburn pills if you're really hungry.  They neutralize the acid that builds up and makes you hungry.
10. Keep a bin near you when you eat.  If you feel you are going to over eat, throw the rest of the food away.
11. Wear a rubber band around your wrist, snap it against your skin when you're tempted to eat.
12. Drink diet soda.  It'll fill you up and only has 1 calorie.
13. Clean something gross, you'll lose your appetite.
14. Brush your teeth.  The taste of toothpaste will be horrid with the taste of food.
15. Every calorie counts.  When you're sitting, shake your leg, tap a pencil, never stop moving.
16. Drink a glass of water every hour, not only will it make your stomach feel full, it will also give you great hydrated skin.  Cold water burns more calories, while warm water makes you feel full.
17. Throw away the foods you think you'll binge on.
18. When going out, only take out the amount of money that you'll need.  Nothing extra.  That way you won't be tempted to spend it on food.
19. Sitting up straight and having good posture burns 10% more calories than when you slouch.
20. If you feel like eating, eat negative calorie foods only.
21. Carry a picture of your favourite trigger everywhere you go.
22. Take a sip of water between every bite.
23. Stay cold.  Your body burns more calories trying to warm you up.
24. If you're bingeing, don't swallow the food, spit it out.
25. Eat your meals on smaller plates.
26. Clentch your butt all the time.  Guys like a nice ass and you burn calories too.
27. Take kelp pills, they boost metabolism.
28. Pro-plus are caffeine tablets which you can buy at most shops, no need for calorie infested coffee.
29. Use laxatives.
30. Get comfy in bed, being comfy means you won't want to get up to get food.
31. Use your mind.  Think about what the food would look like in your stomach after you've eaten it.
32. Sabotage your food.  Adding too much salt etc works great.
33. Go shopping and try on clothes that you wish you could fit in to.
34. Pinch all your fat and see how disgusting it is and then you'll think that if you eat you'll just add more to it.
35. If people start saying they're worried about your weight loss, get really upset and say how mad you get everytime somebody comments on your skinny body.  Complain a lot about how you wish you could gain weight so people will stop making rude comments.
36. If you eat, ONLY eat when people are watching.
37. Obesity is disgusting.  Remember that.
38. Thinspiration is your best friend.  You think you've lost weight?  Trust me you haven't.  Just check out the models online and you'll realise that.
39. Live by the scales.  It's right and you're FAT.
40. Keep in mind - If your skinny friend eats a lot, that DOES NOT mean that you can do the same.
41. Learn to love that empty feeling in your stomach.  Trust me you'll feel repulsed when it starts getting full again.
42. What what other people, espescially fat people, eat and feel superior because thy're feeding their bodies and getting fatter.
43. Drink 2 tbsp of vinegar before the meal, so (aparently) it will help suck the fat out of it.
44. 
    Spicy foods raise your metabolism and burn slightly more calories than other foods. They'll also help keep you from getting bored with the same old boring low-cal stuff.
45. Think higher of yourself! You're too good to put THAT in your body!

What no one knows about us...

1. I need you to believe in me.
2. I don’t and wont stop.
3. I need you remind me of my qualities, not my mistakes.
4. I'm scared.

5. I know it seems like I'm this strong person who can get
   through anything, but inside I'm fragile.  I've had so many
   things thrown at me, and each one has only made a crack. 
   What I'm afraid of is shattering.

6. You look at me and see a pretty smile and think "she's so
   happy", but there's so much behind these eyes that u will never know...

Nways, i need an ana buddy,
cuz im gonna fast and i dont wanna do it by myself!!! hehe!!

nways, g2g

take care huns, and stay strong!!!!!

kisses!!

~*Mia*~